Not going well.

First let me say, Kat is thriving. She loves her school and her school loves her.

Now on to the bummer part. Drew is not thriving. Drew is bumming. Drew hates his school and we're finding that it just isn't a good fit for him. I desperately want to pull him. Peter wants to wait it out. P plans to go up there this week to observe Drew in action and to see if there is any way we can make this better but I really feel like this is a personality conflict and that Drew is never going to be a Montessori kid. He wants to work with people. He wants to play and run around and be silly. They want calm and quiet and independent work.

It's a rough situation to be in. We love Montessori. Love it. I think I have come to accept that it isn't for Drew but Peter is more willing to stick around and to try to get it to work. I feel like there are strikes against it right now. The price went up and it is hard to afford. Drew isn't happy. Drew would be happy at a play school. *sigh*

First day(s) of school.

Kat and Drew both had their first day of school today. Kat at the GATE school, Drew at the Montessori.
I am happy to report that it was a wonderful day for both. Drew was super disappointed that Kat got to take the bus and he didn't but he recouped well.
Kat declared her teacher to be "the best teacher EVER."
Drew declared his school to be "not as nice as the old one." (SNORT! The new school is not only a nicer facility, it has a better teaching philosophy, better nutrition program, and a better set of special classes throughout the week. Drew just doesn't like change.)

It was a great day! Now to get up and do it again for the next 10 months!

Go West, Young Man.

Drew ran away from home yesterday. Of course, he needed my help in packing but I was glad to oblige. We punished him for putting magnets in his mouth and that was the straw that broke the camels back for him. He said he was going to move in with the family across the street, he was certain they would treat him better.
I pulled out his suitcase and snuck downstairs to call across to their house to ask if they were busy and if Drew could come for a short visit. After filling them in on what was going on and what I wanted them to do, they were happy to help.
I walked Drew across the street, said goodbye and turned around. He skipped up to their door and was let right in.
The neighbors harassed him in the way that only truly good-natured people can. They showed him where he'd be sleeping, not in the youngest daughters bed like he hoped, in the basement where it gets really dark. They made him work in the kitchen. After about 5 minutes of this I walked over to retrieve him and he came running out the door before I even made it to the porch. He was quite a sight running outside in his cowboy boots with his little suitcase bumping behind him.
I've never seen him so happy to be home and in his own bed.

The grass is not greener, Boo Boo!

Playdate with GATE kids!

We hosted a wonderful playdate at our home today for 3 other children entering the GATE school in the fall. It was such a nice opportunity for the children to get to know one another and to build some solid relationships before they are thrust into a new school situation in the fall.
The children played well together. There was no "smart" talk, it was all play and swimming and being silly. It was like they knew they were in the company of kindred spirits and were all able to relax together.
We plan to do it again soon and hope to get some more children in on the playdates!

Montessori Graduation.

I guess it's already been 11 days since Kat graduated Montessori. Her school has a graduation ceremony that rivals the opening ceremony of the Olympics. It's that good.

Kat was asked to be the emcee this year. So. stinking. cute! Kat introduced each of the children and the song or dance they would be performing.

Kat also sang a solo in French and danced the Polish dance. It was darling and sweet and I cried the whole time. It was so touching to see all of those innocent faces ready to face the world and first grade.

We're so thankful we placed her in Montessori. A place where she fit in and was allowed to learn at her own pace.

"Don't I look hot?"

Kat was playing in the pool with her little friend and her brother when I heard her say, "Don't I look hot?"
I flipped on the inside. Seriously? Hot? I managed to ask her if she meant to say that she feels warm. No, she wondered if she looked hot like sexy.

ACK! ACK! ACK!

I immediately start to blame the little clique of girls in her public school kindergarten for being little hussies internally and externally say something about how both she and her little friend are beautiful girls and no one at the pool is "hot."

It's just the times I guess...it probably shouldn't be a big deal to me but it really bothered me.

Saying good-bye to Montessori.

Almost 4 years ago I packed Kat into the backseat of my car, drove her to the Montessori school near our home, pulled up the the curb, and let a teacher I didn't know help her out of her carseat and let her walk away.

Then I cried the whole way home.

We chose Montessori education for our children before they were even born. Everything about it sounded wonderful. Following the child, self-directed learning, practical life activities, math, science, reading, peace education, social graces, music, dance, nature walks. We loved the sound of it. The one thing Montessori does not provide is imaginative play. That wasn't a big deal to us since we knew that we'd be able to provide that at home.

Today, I packed Kat into the backseat of my car...well, she actually packed herself, drove her to the Montessori school near our home, pulled up to the curb and watched her walk herself in. In these three years of schooling her confidence has been bolstered. She knows what she is capable of and she knows when to ask for help. She's learned to read and is at least 3 grade levels ahead in language. She's learned math. She understands place value through the 10,000's and has been introduced to place values up to 1,000,000. She can add, subtract, multiply and divide. Fractions are no stranger to Kat. She can dust, vacuum, and wash dishes. She knows how to apologize properly. She knows to look out for younger children and to help them when they need help. She knows how to speak to adults. She can name all 50 states, all of the oceans and continents. She can tell you what an archipelago is and give you an example of one.

Montessori has been a dream for Kat. She's been able to learn at her own pace. She's met new friends from different cultures. She's sang and danced and played on the playground. She's painted pictures and rolled in mud and played fairy games. We're so glad that we found the school and teachers who were willing to teach her mind what it wanted to know and to allow her spirit to be a child.

As they say, "All good things must come to an end" and this is the end of Montessori for our Kat. Next year she moves on to first grade at the public GATE school. The GATE school incorporates some aspects of Montessori education but it is not a Montessori school. She leaves behind the sweet world of preschool and moves into a realm of bigger kids with more "sophisticated" points of view.

We're proud of Kat. We're proud of what she has accomplished. We're proud of her Montessori school for providing such a beautiful, nurturing environment.

It's a bittersweet time. She's accomplished so much and it is time to move on. I thank God for the precious time she has had at her wonderful school with her amazing teachers. May her next school experience be half as good as her Montessori experience and we won't have a thing to complain about.

SHE'S IN! SHE'S IN!

The letter came today. I waited until Peter got home to open it. We're so excited!!!

This is the week.

The decisions were made yesterday. The letters mailed today. Doing lots of positive visualization. Doing even more praying. Please want her, GATE school. Please!

I don't know what to think!

Kat's birthday falls during the Easter holiday this year. Because of that I made sure to make her birthday cupcakes and take them into both schools last week. I wanted her to have the lovely experience and subsequent memory of sharing cupcakes with her class.

I slaved over the butterfly cupcakes from the "Hello Cupcake!" book. It took me hours and hours to make the wings. Thank goodness my mother took on the task of baking the cupcakes and frosting them so my only task was decorating them.

So! We took the cupcakes in to both schools on Friday and they were met with much fanfare. Everyone thought they were so pretty and I was so happy to see much being made over Kat's birthday treat and that Kat was basking in the glow of the praise.

During AM kindergarten Kat was given the Montessori birthday ceremony. Kat was able to select anyone in the room to hold the model of the sun while she held the model of the earth while her teacher spoke about her first 5 years of life. Kat was so sweet and selected her brother to hold the sun. <3 The ceremony lasted about 4 minutes and was so beautiful, so touching. I loved it and so did Kat!

For PM kindergarten Kat and I went into her classroom together. This almost never happens as parents are expected to say goodbye at the door and leave. Since the cupcakes were heavy and delicate I chose to walk right in and help her out. Ms. M admired the cupcakes and said to me, "Kat is perfect, you really ought to write a book to share how you did it with others." Very flattering but really? This is the same little girl that I could never take to the park because she would tantrum as we left. Tantrum for hours and hours. The same little girl who would scratch and kick and bite when she was unhappy. The same little girl who cried bloody murder when I tried to rock her to sleep at night. And don't even think about singing one of your lullabies, ma'am!

I think we're just lucky that Kat has turned out so well with our muddling through the first 4 years of her life.

So as we prepare to celebrate 6 years with Kat next week. I just have to say...we've come a long way!

Hooked on Phonics.

Okay, we aren't really hooked on phonics at our house but I enjoyed a phonetical moment with Drew today. We have a gallery wall in our home with many, many black and white family pictures on it. In the bottom corner of the grouping there is a hand painted sign that says, "Happily Ever After." This morning Drew went through and produced all of the sounds in each word then did it again quickly so that he managed to read the three words.
I was so proud! IN YOUR FACE CMV!

Like a sore thumb or why are little girls so stinkin' mean?

Kat has been saying that she wants a pair of Twinkle Toes shoes. They are $40, have BRIGHT led lights and are UGLY so naturally I said no. She's taken it well and actually has never brought it up again since the time we were standing in front of the display and I told her that I wouldn't pay for them.
I had no idea that she wanted them because there was a "Twinkle Toes" club at school. Kat was told that she could not join because she did not own a pair.
I feel badly but I am still not going to buy her a pair. I don't want to send the message to her that it is important to have things to fit in and I don't think that Twinkle Toes shoes are beneficial to the learning process at school. Kat has cute clothes, she has nice shoes. She looks like every other girl in her class, well kept, well dressed, and sweet.
However, I am kind of fed up with three of the little girls in her class. Kat has tried over and over to play with them and is always met with resistance. One of the girls who is excluding Kat is the daughter of a teacher at Kat's school. This is awkward.
I told Kat last night that even if she got the Twinkle Toes these girls would likely try to find a reason to exclude her from their little group. Kat was surprised but believed me. I am glad that she trusts my guidance at this point.
After this conversation Kat mentioned to me (quite proudly) that she is in charge of playing "Happy Birthday" on the piano while the children in her class sing for her classmate's birthday celebrations. It makes me wonder if the two are related.

Speech Therapy and the dependent mother.

I had a meeting with Drew's regular speech therapist today and she said that Drew is ready to be done with his weekly speech sessions. I am happy and nervous. I like that safety net of having professionals interacting with him each week. I am happy that I will now have more time at home on Tuesday afternoons though. It will be nice to walk Kat to school and to come home for a couple of hours before going off to work for the evening.

Ms. J said that Drew is extremely bright and has a terrific memory. That he is ready for Kindergarten in the fall. The funny part is that Drew isn't eligible to go to Kindergarten this fall, he needs to wait until the fall of 2012 to start Kindergarten!

We'll keep meeting with the speech therapist until May and then we'll do an IEP for Drew's 4 year old preschool year. After that all bets are off as to whether he will remain in the special ed program for hearing or not. If he continues to behave as a typical student he will lose his IEP and will no longer be followed by a team of teachers, speech therapists, audiologists and social workers. Again, that makes me feel happy and nervous.

Is it just that teachers are human too?

Today at drop off Kat's teacher pulled me aside and asked if there was anything we wanted her to be doing with Kat for the rest of the school year. Such an odd question that I can't get to the bottom of. Is she asking for permission to ride her hard and make her learn a lot? Does she just want to know if we have expectations that we haven't spoken of yet? I am not sure.

What I do know is that we want Kat to have a lovely kindergarten experience. We want her to paint and play and sing and dance. We want her to enjoy picture books and trips to the library and sunny days on the playground and drippy ice cream cones. We want her to have a wonderful, wonderful childhood. Of course we want her to learn meaningful information at school. We want her to feel like school is fun and that learning is worth working for. But we don't want her burnt out on school and we don't feel like she needs to learn extra just to "get ahead." She is already ahead.

I think I need to speak with the teacher again...

Parent Teacher Conferences.

We just returned from Kat's parent teacher conference at the Montessori school. Not big changes there. Kat is well liked, Kat is mature, Kat is kind, Kat is gifted. Well, the gifted label is a new one from this school but not a new one to us in general.
Kat is working on cursive writing, multiplication, land forms, painting, practical life, and using a dictionary. We're pleased.

Mind games.

Ay yi yi! Yesterday I had a brief, unplanned moment alone with Kat's public school teacher. Ms. M asked me where we intended to send Kat to school next year and we told her that we were waiting to hear back from the GATE school and I crossed my fingers in the air. Ms. M rolled her eyes at me and said, "I don't think you have anything to worry about." and walked away.
Ummm...100 applicants, 12 spots. Oh sure, that's a walk in the park!
Then again, maybe she knows something we don't?

Education today.

Our governor just proposed a new state budget that would cut educational expenditures by the state something like $400 per child. The local school districts are in a panic. I am baffled.

I've been wondering why we can't go a little more low tech in the classroom these days. Why do we need $200 worth of math textbooks per child when the basics have been taught for ages using nothing but a blackboard, some chalk and either a slate or paper and pencil? Why can't we pull out old textbooks to use? Of course, I know that books get old and useless. Information becomes outdated...but how outdated can 2x2=4 become?

Is there honestly nowhere to cut back?

Science fair.

Kat participated in her first school science fair yesterday. She was over the moon! Last month we received a letter from the school inviting the students to participate and I asked her if she would like to. Once she said yes, I asked her what she wanted to do her project on. With no hesitation she said, "Why can't astronauts go to Jupiter?"
We headed to the library and found the appropriate books, she read them and was ready to make her poster.
We helped her cut out the paper and I showed her how to paint the lines of Jupiter's clouds but other than that, this is all hers. We were so proud!

We invited the whole family out to see her science fair and many were able to make it. Grandma Chris and her boyfriend Ken came. Grandpa and Nana, Aunt Jenny and Aunt Kathy, and Pete's Uncle Karl all came. Such a nice evening!

Waiting.

Now that all of Kat's testing is over we are just waiting. We'll find out the results and if she is offered a spot at the GATE school in May.

The sweetest thing.

Drew is a charmer. A big time charmer. He sees a lady, a woman, a girl, a teenage girl, anyone female and he starts to warm them up. "I like your shoes." "You're pretty!""What kind of car do you drive?"
It's hilarious. The boy loves females. Loves them.

Today he turned his charm on me and in doing so managed to make a room full of women fall at his feet.

It was his preschool Valentine's party. The children all lined up and sang songs. The second song they sang was "My Girl" by the Temptations. On the last chorus with impeccable timing he sang his love to me. The children all sang, "I guess you'd say, what can make me feel this way? My girl" and as soon as the children sang "My girl" Drew sang, "My mom." "I guess you'd say, what can make me feel this way? My girl" "My mom" "My girl" "My mom!"

I managed to get it on tape through a fluke and it is such a treasured moment.

Such a sweet boy!

Parent inventory.

Oh dear me. The GATE school sent us a parent questionnaire with 12 items on it. We've been filling it out and trying to be honest about Kat without blowing too much sunshine. The reality is...Kat is a great kid. She's smart, she's friendly, she's talented. Everyone loves Kat. If you don't believe me, just meet Kat. You'll be a believer in no time.
She's not perfect but they didn't ask us any questions about her faults. If they had asked "Is your child stubborn?" we could have gone on for pages.

It's hard to be fair and balanced when it is your kid...

Potty training...Suburban Rebellion style.

Potty training is one of the most stressful parts of parenting a small child. We were fortunate to fall on a method that worked like a charm with both of our children.
The way we did it was to spend a week in hardcore potty training with them. We read books about the potty, we go pick out underpants, we talk potty with everyone, we watched potty movies, we sit on the potty every 20 minutes while were home and we were home as much as possible. We celebrate the victories, we clean up the accidents cheerfully. Everything we do for a week is potty. All potty, all the time.

Then, we drop it.

Life goes back to normal. Diapers are back in use. We go out and do things. We don't mention potty at all. After a couple-ish weeks of no potty I start to offer underpants in the morning when we are dressing for the day. It took my daughter 3 months to take the underpants and it took my son about a week to take them. After that, they were both trained.
I think the "magic" in our method is that they are in control of their own potty learning. They decide when they are ready and we just provide the things they need to learn how to do it and to recognize when they are ready. There's no pressure, no power struggles, just a decision on their part to do it.

Testing neurosis.

I've worked at the public library for 13 years now and in that time I have seen a lot of different types of parents. The type that annoys me the most would probably be what everyone has been blogging about lately...the Tiger Mother. I have been asked many times for books on how to study for our state's standardized elementary school test which I find odd but the strangest requests I have had are for books to help study for IQ tests. Seriously, people? I guess that's better than the parents who want to drop their children off at the library for free babysitting while they go to work or shopping...

Well, once we got the letter verifying Kat's date for group IQ testing I started to stew about it. Should we prepare Kat? What if she is put in a room with 2 other children who have been trained to take the test? Of course you can't raise your IQ by studying but could we raise her chances of doing as well as she possibly could by studying?

I went round and round on that crazy train for a while. I grabbed a book on critical thinking skills and took it home vacillating between "Yes, let's help her out a bit" and "You need to get a grip, Momma!" A coworker suggested that we ask Kat if she would like to try some things from the book to prepare. A friend laughed at me about checking the book out and told me to leave the girl alone. Pete said that he would like to go over some of the items in the book with her so that she knows what might be on the test and will feel confident.

So, Pete will spend some cozy one on one time with Kat over the next couple of weeks going through the book. He and I are in agreement that it should be done in a spirit of fun and that nothing should be taught or drilled. He's just going to show her some puzzles and see what happens from there.

"We are pleased to inform you..."

We got a letter in the mail the other day stating that Kat had passed the first part of her GATE testing. I was pleased that it was a pretty quick turn around between the testing and the letter. She took the test on Monday and we got the letter on Friday. I was not as happy that the letter didn't give us any other information. How did Kat do on the test? Just good enough? Stellar?
We found out that there are 100 children testing for 12 spots.
The second round of testing will occur when the school gets enough students together to hire an independent tester to administer an IQ test. They do it in groups to save money. After that test we will know in May what her results are and if she qualifies to go to the free-standing GATE school.

Drew hilarity!

Yesterday Drew turned 4. The boy is a little Alex P. Keaton, he loves money. He carries money around with him, he talks about money, he plays with money, the boy loves money. And as much as he loves money, he hates to wash. So, when I found this bar of money embedded soap at the Hallmark store, we snatched it up!
We gave it to him for his birthday and told him to go wash his hands with it. We told him that the more he washes the sooner he will be able to get to the money.
What does the boy do? He puts the soap in the sink and turns it on to a trickle and walks away. I went into the bathroom a few minutes later to find what he had done and called for Pete. After Pete came in and had a good laugh, Drew came running in full tilt yelling, "Don't touch that!"
He knew precisely what he was doing. Too funny!

Outnumbered.

An interesting dynamic in our household is the fact that I am the only one who is not gifted. I'm perfectly bright, I have a Master's degree...I can hold my own. Nevertheless, I am not gifted. My mind doesn't make amazing connections, I don't learn effortlessly like the rest of my family seems to, I don't process information fast.
It's odd to parent two little people and to know beyond the shadow of a doubt that they are smarter than you are. The first time I realized that Kat was smarter than me was when she was about 9 months old. Peter and I were sitting on the floor with her one night teaching her how to use her shape sorter. We dumped all of the blocks out on the rug and showed her the holes in the top of the box and how each shape fit in its own spot. We did a few and handed her a shape. She popped it right in so we clapped and smiled and gave her another one. She popped it in so we clapped and smiled and gave her another one. We did this 4 times until she looked me straight in the eye with a funny look on her face then pulled the top off of the box and proceeded to put the rest of the shapes in the box and the lid back on.
Our 9 month old showed us the most elegant solution to the problem at hand. If we wanted the blocks in the box, she would get them there for us.

Discovering that Drew is smarter than me has been more of a process. Drew wasn't supposed to walk or talk. Yet he was reading letters at 18 months, some words at 2 years, doing addition and subtraction at 3 years, and still surprising us daily with the things he does. He isn't as flashy as Kat, it would be easy to miss his intelligence, but it is there. He's my tortoise, slow and steady.

Peter is a genius. There is no doubt in my mind about that. There is nothing mechanical that he cannot fix, there is no problem he cannot solve. He's both hilarious and endearing when he talks about building machines that build machines.

It's interesting being the intellectual lightweight around my house. They all completely depend on me and love me deeply. I just wonder when they are going to realize that they're all smarter than me! (Peter knows this, of course, but is too kind to let on that he knows!)

GATE testing.

Kat is going to have testing to see if she qualifies for the GATE program here in town. Her test is on Monday and I am a little nervous about the whole thing. She's a bright girl but what if my motherlove means that I am not seeing her clearly? What if she decides not to bother with the test and goofs off? What if she misses the cut off by a smidge? What if she gets accepted and we have to decide where to send her to school next year? What if she goes to the GATE school and Drew doesn't? That could bring some emotional and logistical pain.
Silly worries. They aren't consuming but when I think about Monday I think about these worries. I also worry that I don't really know what to tell her about the testing. From her point of view, her current school is the bee's knees. First grade looks awesome to her. She knows the kids in her class. She can't wait to eat in the lunchroom and play on the playground. Why on earth would she want to give that up for a school she's only been to once or twice? So far I've only told her that she will go for a test, the tester will be nice, she should answer all of the questions as best she can and that the test will decide where she might go to school next year. We talked a bit about her current classroom in public school and how some kids there learn fast like her and some take more time. I told her that the GATE school is full of kids who learn fast and that she wouldn't have to spend so much time waiting between tasks. She liked the idea of that!
It's hard to know what is best right now. We have wonderful options available to us, all full of pros and cons. What to do...what to do...